When we think about “traditional” weddings, there are a lot of things that come to mind: a bride in a beautiful white dress being escorted down the aisle by her father, the “Bridal March” song (known as “Here Comes the Bride”), bridesmaids and groomsmen, a flower girl and ring bearer, a reading from The Letter to the Corinthians, the bride and groom being separated before the wedding, and common phrases like “speak now or forever hold your peace,” and “I now pronounce you husband and wife.”

But there’s a reason that I put “traditional” in quotes: for Catholics, none of these things are essential to the ceremony, while a few of them are actually forbidden.

The fact of the matter—and I can say this because I’m writing on the internet, very far away from the angry glares and fists of brides—the wedding is not about creating a fairytale in which everyone marvels at the “princess” being married in a fantasy world. Weddings are not all about the bride. *gasp*

And there goes my female readership.

But really, a wedding is about what the couple is doing, not just about what the bride is doing. What the couple is doing is profound: they are exchanging vows to one another with God as their witness. In other words, they are entering into a solemn, life-long covenant with God and each other. Their saying of the words, “I take you to be my husband/wife,” is arguably the most profound thing either person will ever say. It is the essence and height of the whole ceremony, and everything else should point to this moment.

Which is why, despite the confusion of many Catholics and non-Catholics alike, many of the “traditional” aspects of weddings are left behind in Catholics ceremonies. That’s the focus of the newest installment of “Catholicism in Focus.”

What’s with Catholic Weddings?

On December 8 of last year, Pope Francis officially opened the doors to the “Year of Mercy,” a focused effort to remind us of the mercy God shows us each and every day, and a call to show that mercy to others in our world. His document announcing the year and it’s purpose (found here) is a wonderful source of inspiration and something that could easily serve as a guide to our year’s prayer life.

And how could it not? Mercy is an essential aspect of our life as Christians, right up there with love, justice, sacrifice, and faith in terms of our most used words. Christianity, by its very nature, is a religion of mercy. The good news of Jesus Christ is that God has come to be like us, has shown us love, and offers us a new path despite our sins and failings. Rather than give us what we deserve, God gives us what we do not deserve: forgiveness and eternal salvation to those who follow.

For this reason, I recently sat down with Fr. Patrick Tuttle, OFM, Franciscan Friar and pastor of St. Anthony’s Catholic Church in Greenville, SC. Not only has Fr. Patrick personally shown me great mercy over the years, he was the first friar that I met when I was in college and has been a tremendous influence in my life, inspiring me to be a better Christian, to take leadership in the Church, and to eventually join the Franciscans. As a spiritual mentor, fellow Franciscan brother, and close friend, I wanted to get his take on what this year could mean for me training for the priesthood and for all of us Christians. We came up with three things worth sharing: Forgiveness, Joy, and Confession.

For those on email, click here for the video.

 

Those of us born between 1982 and 2004 are in a special class of people known as the “Millennial Generation.” We were raised in the dotcom boom and technological age, came of age during the attacks on September 11 and subsequent Iraq War, and now enter our adults years after the Great Recession of 2008. Some point out how these factors have developed the confidence and resilience of our generation, that we are widely tolerant when dealing with social issues, and have become more civically minded, volunteering and getting involved to a greater extent than previous generations. Other have pointed to a less noble set of characteristics, that we are driven by a sense of entitlement, detach ourselves from traditional institutions for the sake of the individual, and are particularly more narcissistic than previous generations (selfies anyone?)

All of this, to the extent that it is true, has had an impact on Millennials’ engagement with the Church. By and large, it has meant the acceptance the secular over ecclesiastical, showing a drastic dip in church attendance compared to the previous generation, while engaging the needs of the world but through volunteerism in a more profound way. Some point to the desire among Millennials to recapture aspects of the tradition lost in previous decades, while it seems clear, even if just anecdotally, that Millennials from both sides of the aisle are more comfortable challenging the practice of the Church for what they see to be a more “authentic” way of life.

For these reasons, among others, Millennials raise issues for the Church that previous generations did not, at least not to the same extent. How does one balance the dominant desire of this generation to assert its individuality and “authenticity” with the tradition and teaching authority of the hierarchical Church? As young religious leaders, how do we navigate the obedience we have to our superiors with the obedience we have to our consciences? To what extent can we learn from the Church, and to what extent do our voices need to be heard to challenge it?

These were the questions I asked Fr. Daniel P. Horan, OFM, Franciscan author and theologian. As a fellow Millennial engaged in the political, social, and theological issues of the Church, he offered balanced responses and encouraging insights into some of the issues facing our generation, and how all of us, no matter our age, can faithfully and authentically engage the Church in today’s world. I had a great time talking with Dan about a whole host of topics, the most relevant of which I share here (unfortunately, the bit about Dan being in a bowling league in high school didn’t make the cut. Sometimes you just have to let something go!)

Please feel free to comment on the conversation, ask any questions that you have, and check out Fr. Dan’s blog, Facebook page, and YouTube channel. For those on email, you can watch this video, as well as others, here on my YouTube channel.

This weekend, we celebrate the lives of all the saints in the history of the Church. In my humble opinion, the communion of saints is one of the greatest gems our Church has to offer. We are not individuals finding our way on a journey for the first time; we walk in the footsteps of those great men and women who have gone before us. The saints offer us an example of how they lived in the past as well as providing intercession for us now in the present.

Recently, I was asked who my favorite saint was… besides Francis. With two thousand years of incredible men and women to choose from, how could I choose just one? So I didn’t. In this week’s Ask Br. Casey video, I decided to pick my top three inspiring saints (apart from St. Francis). It was still a difficult decision to make. Anthony of Padua, Thérèse of Lisieux, Patrick, Augustine, Jerome, Cyril of Jerusalem, Gregory the Great, Blessed Mother Theresa, and Pope John XXIII have all inspired me in one way or another to become a better Christian. But none of them made the cut.

I hope the three saints I picked give you as much inspiration to live the Gospel as they have given me. Who would you pick in your top three? Let me know in the comments, and be sure to ask your own question! Thanks to Marc for this one! (Watch the video here.)

You’ve seen Leno. You’ve seen Fallon. The “man on the street” sketch is always a hit. Take a camera, put people on the spot with a question, and see what you get. (For instance, have Mets pitcher Matt Harvey go as a normal newscaster asking New Yorkers what they think of pitcher Matt Harvey.)

This past weekend, I decided to try it for myself in what is the first ever “friar on the street.” There was one difference, though (besides the habit and drastically lower budget!): instead of me asking strangers questions, I asked parishioners of St. Francis of Assisi parish to approach me with their questions. Anything that wanted to know about me or the friars. What could go wrong?!

I hope you have as much fun watching this segment of “Ask Br. Casey” ON LOCATION as we did filming it. Be sure to ask your own questions in the comments for the regular segment returning next week!